But no, says I. Don't get me wrong, though. It wasn't because I didn't want to come across as a self-absorbed egomaniac who harped solely on past glories. I still am. It was because I came up with this really cool piece that refused to be condensed into a throwaway Story of The Day.
It's been a while since we've done this, but... here we go!
RM1.JPG (Part 1)
You know how sometimes weird files mysteriously appear in your pendrive, and nobody has any clue how they got there?
It happened to Ray.
This is the story of a man who one day found two new files in his pendrive, RM1_front.jpg and RM1_back.jpg.
Mystified, he tried printing both files front and back.
The results were unbelievable to say the least. The printed copy perfectly resembled a new RM1 note, down to the squinting Agong and double serial number. Even more amazingly, the file could somehow transform the texture of ordinary A4 paper into that of an RM1 note, complete with silver-coloured lining on the back.
He couldn't believe his eyes. He tried printing a couple more, and there they were - crisp and fresh-smelling as from an ATM machine.
Determined to put this anomaly to the test, he went to the mamak stall downstairs, ordered a packet of limau ais and handed the man two of the notes he had printed and cut out himself. Surely he would notice something strange about it?
He didn't. He just took it, gave Ray 80 sen change and continued bobbing along to generic Hindi music blaring from the cheap speakers.
Ray felt his hands grow cold.
He had, literally, printed money.
*****
Now being an accountant by profession, Ray was careful and calculated in preserving his new-found treasure.
Of course, the first thing he made sure was not to tell anyone about this. Not even his wife. Especially not his wife.
Next, he made copies. Scores and scores of copies, as many as it took. This was not going to be a story that ended with the pendrive becoming corrupted, that he was sure.
Once all the copies were safely stored and his wife safely in bed, he went to work. Working overnight, he managed to print 166 notes before dozing off at 5am. That was RM166. Not bad for a night's work.
*****
The next day at work was hell for Ray. Something's got to give when you sleep for 2 hours before getting through an 11-hour day. He zombied his way through, before plonking asleep at 7pm at home without even taking dinner. Next thing he knew, he was awake at 1am, sleeping wife beside.
With a mind of their own, his feet led him beside the printer.
Time to get to work again.
To be continued.
